Welcome to the wine business, Sarah Jessica Parker

sarah jessica parker wineSome friendly advice as you embark on Sarah Jessica Parker wine

Dear Ms. Parker:

Several news reports say you’re starting your own wine brand, a sauvignon blanc and rose from New Zealand. I figured someone should offer you a few words of wisdom, since the wine business, in its own way, is as treacherous as acting. Which, of course, you know a little about.

• Celebrity wine ventures rarely come to a good end. Just ask Joe Montana. Or Dan Aykroyd.

• The wine business’ attitude toward women has been less than progressive. In this, it’s not as backward as Hollywood and it’s much better than it used to be. But there are still comparatively few female winemakers; the same is true for executives who aren’t in marketing.

• Your marketing types report you will be “hands-on” during production. You should clarify this with them, since some smart-ass wine writer will ask if hands-on during production means you will fly to New Zealand to pick grapes.

• The wine’s availability may be a problem. No one will be able to buy the wine from Amazon or in a grocery store in Manhattan, thanks to the three-tier system. Also, there’s no guarantee it will be in your neighborhood wine shop (so don’t get mad at Matthew when he tells you he can’t find it). Plus, since three-tier is constitutionally protected, there’s nothing you can do except complain to your distributor.

• The news stories say the rose will be dry. Please hold them to this. The 21st century wine business treats sweet and dry the same way Hollywood treats net and gross. In other words, it lies.

Hope this helps. If you have any other questions, let me know.

Yours in wine,
The Wine Curmudgeon

One thought on “Welcome to the wine business, Sarah Jessica Parker

  • By Melanie Ofenloch - Reply

    Great sage advice!

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